As I write this, I am sitting in my room on the day before election day, trying to take in the full magnitude of what could happen. Outsdide my window, it is raining, as it has been off and on for the last few days. A quick glance at the weather forecast for tomorrow indicates the return of the sun. Yeah, that sounds about right.
Seriously folks, whatever happens tomorrow, come next year GEORGE W. BUSH WILL NO LONGER BE OUR PRESIDENT!!! I remember a time when it almost seemed like this day would never come. I figured we'd all be wiped off the planet through global annihilation, or else Bush would somehow find a way to declare himself dictator for life, but none of that has come to pass. What's even better, is that practically everybody who is intelligent and semi-informed hates him now. How good it felt when the tide started to turn and those of us who were against him all along were finally proven right.
Of course, we could end up with the booby prize in the form of the McCain-Palin ticket. The next bit of good news is that this is looking increasingly unlikely. Swing states are turning blue, red states are learning to swing, and hundreds of thousands of people who were tricked into thinking that they were republicans are now waking up and realizing that they are actually democrats.
Ultimately, it looks like there's a very good chance that after tomorrow we will have a new leader who is intelligent, articulate, open-minded, and even-tempered. How amazing is that? Not only that, but Congress, as well as many state legislatures and executive branches, will also be moving to the left. In addition, many of us will have the opportunity to initiate more immediate change by passing or rejecting various ballot propositions, including the historic prop. 8 in California, which will not only be a huge victory for gays in CA but will be a very important symbolic victory for anyone who wants to see this state and this nation take on a more progressive agenda.
Don't get me wrong, I am preparing myself for the worst and knocking on wood even as we speak. The people of this country have let me down before, and like many of you I am familiar with the sensation of being burned. Still, I am shoring up all of the positive energy I can muster and basking in a glow of hope brighter and warmer than any I have experienced in a long time.
Let's do it people. Let's get out there and change the world.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
the times, they are a' changin'
So, much has happened in the time since my last post. It would seem that world is coming to an end, or at least that's the impression you might get if you were to have tuned into any newscast in the past couple of weeks. Our economy is crumbling, they say. The future looks bleak. The American way of life, and the Age of Empire that it has afforded us is rapidly falling to pieces.
Not to make light of a situation that will certainly make the next few months, even years, pretty rough for most of us, but there is a part of me that wants to say, good for us. It's about damn time. If there is one thing that this current crisis has made clear, it's that many of our old ways of thinking were just plain wrong. Our government has handled itself poorly. Our economy as it exists now has been built on a number of false pretenses. We have allowed a small group of opportunistic vultures to rape us of our resources, our finances, our very sense of control while we have been left out in the cold, struggling to get by in our everyday lives.
While all of this has been going on, we have allowed the public debate to be dominated by petty squabbles over personal issues and constant fear-mongering designed to keep the rabble in line. Meanwhile, we have been fed bullshit notions regarding what it means to be prosperous in this country and this world.
Many of us have seen for a long time that the situation was bad and could only get worse. Only a few of us, perhaps, have come to realize that the situation has to get worse before it can get better.
I truly believe that this current state of affairs and all of the missteps leading up to it will serve as a wake up call to anyone who is paying attention, and with things as bad as they are, who isn't paying attention at this point?
I believe that people are finally realizing that we need deep and systematic changes throughout our society. We need to change both our actions and our view of the world. We need to take responsibility, and part of what that entails is paying more attention and demanding more from our leaders and ourselves.
I think that ultimately we will weather whatever storm comes our way, and we will emerge all the better for it. I believe that we will ultimately be more open, more aware, and more determined. I believe that we will stop letting others control our destiny and we will all learn to work together to create a future that will be better for everyone. I believe that we will accomplish all of these things because in the end we have to. What's the alternative?
Not to make light of a situation that will certainly make the next few months, even years, pretty rough for most of us, but there is a part of me that wants to say, good for us. It's about damn time. If there is one thing that this current crisis has made clear, it's that many of our old ways of thinking were just plain wrong. Our government has handled itself poorly. Our economy as it exists now has been built on a number of false pretenses. We have allowed a small group of opportunistic vultures to rape us of our resources, our finances, our very sense of control while we have been left out in the cold, struggling to get by in our everyday lives.
While all of this has been going on, we have allowed the public debate to be dominated by petty squabbles over personal issues and constant fear-mongering designed to keep the rabble in line. Meanwhile, we have been fed bullshit notions regarding what it means to be prosperous in this country and this world.
Many of us have seen for a long time that the situation was bad and could only get worse. Only a few of us, perhaps, have come to realize that the situation has to get worse before it can get better.
I truly believe that this current state of affairs and all of the missteps leading up to it will serve as a wake up call to anyone who is paying attention, and with things as bad as they are, who isn't paying attention at this point?
I believe that people are finally realizing that we need deep and systematic changes throughout our society. We need to change both our actions and our view of the world. We need to take responsibility, and part of what that entails is paying more attention and demanding more from our leaders and ourselves.
I think that ultimately we will weather whatever storm comes our way, and we will emerge all the better for it. I believe that we will ultimately be more open, more aware, and more determined. I believe that we will stop letting others control our destiny and we will all learn to work together to create a future that will be better for everyone. I believe that we will accomplish all of these things because in the end we have to. What's the alternative?
Friday, September 19, 2008
Let's try this again...
So it has been a while since I posted my first blog, and nary a peep ever since. I guess I'm not sure exactly why I started this blog. I don't know what I want to accomplish. I don't know what to say. I'm afraid that anything I put out there for the world to see will basically just be me pissing in the wind. Granted that's not much more than what many people's blogs amount to, but I am ready to do something that really means something.
It feels like we're living in troubled times. I know, I know, it always feels that way. All times are troubled when you really get down to it. The human race has never exactly excelled at peace and prosperity. Still, it seems as though the world's problems are growing, accelerating, and combining in ways that only paranoid science fiction authors used to dream about.
On top of all of this, it seems that we are living in a world that has become intellectually lazy. Solutions are in short supply because we've all been anesthisized by designer drugs, poor diets, failing schools, manipulative media, and a vacuous pop culture.
Now, I'm certainly not saying anything new here. We've all heard these assertions before and in greater detail. Where it really hits home is that I know that I am both feeding and being devoured by the same social constructs that I am attempting to criticize. Granted, I could discuss the issues in greater depth, with informed opinions and elaborate arguments, and that would be fine if I wanted to be just another talking head, metaphorically speaking, cluttering up the oversaturated blogosphere.
What really makes me disappointed with myself is the fact that I once imagined myself to be a potential agent of change. I believed, and ultimately still believe, that I have the capacity to not only identify and analyze society's ills, but also to dream up solutions for them. I want to make an impact. I want to have a positive influence. In the end I want what everybody who really thinks deeply about their own existence truly wants. I want my life to have meaning.
I am not a religious person. I don't believe in redemption and salvation and the promise of something greater which defines us here and in the afterlife. I believe that in order for one's life to have meaning, one must find ways to create and nurture meaning. This requires that famous combination of hard work and inspiration as applied to one's own natural gifts in order to create something significant and novel. Unfortunately I have become lazy, failed to nuture my talents, and allowed myself to be led astray by safety, comfort, and self-absorbtion.
So there you have it. I'm out here lost in the woods. I suppose what I really want to accomplish with the blog is to find a clearing that will get me back on the right path. There's a trail of breadcrumbs out there for me somewhere, if I can find it. Perhaps this blog will amount to little more than me fumbling about in the brush, but at least that's something. At least I know that I haven't given in and let myself be consumed by the deceptive comfort and deadly temptations of the gingerbread house.
It feels like we're living in troubled times. I know, I know, it always feels that way. All times are troubled when you really get down to it. The human race has never exactly excelled at peace and prosperity. Still, it seems as though the world's problems are growing, accelerating, and combining in ways that only paranoid science fiction authors used to dream about.
On top of all of this, it seems that we are living in a world that has become intellectually lazy. Solutions are in short supply because we've all been anesthisized by designer drugs, poor diets, failing schools, manipulative media, and a vacuous pop culture.
Now, I'm certainly not saying anything new here. We've all heard these assertions before and in greater detail. Where it really hits home is that I know that I am both feeding and being devoured by the same social constructs that I am attempting to criticize. Granted, I could discuss the issues in greater depth, with informed opinions and elaborate arguments, and that would be fine if I wanted to be just another talking head, metaphorically speaking, cluttering up the oversaturated blogosphere.
What really makes me disappointed with myself is the fact that I once imagined myself to be a potential agent of change. I believed, and ultimately still believe, that I have the capacity to not only identify and analyze society's ills, but also to dream up solutions for them. I want to make an impact. I want to have a positive influence. In the end I want what everybody who really thinks deeply about their own existence truly wants. I want my life to have meaning.
I am not a religious person. I don't believe in redemption and salvation and the promise of something greater which defines us here and in the afterlife. I believe that in order for one's life to have meaning, one must find ways to create and nurture meaning. This requires that famous combination of hard work and inspiration as applied to one's own natural gifts in order to create something significant and novel. Unfortunately I have become lazy, failed to nuture my talents, and allowed myself to be led astray by safety, comfort, and self-absorbtion.
So there you have it. I'm out here lost in the woods. I suppose what I really want to accomplish with the blog is to find a clearing that will get me back on the right path. There's a trail of breadcrumbs out there for me somewhere, if I can find it. Perhaps this blog will amount to little more than me fumbling about in the brush, but at least that's something. At least I know that I haven't given in and let myself be consumed by the deceptive comfort and deadly temptations of the gingerbread house.
Friday, September 5, 2008
hello, cruel world...
Hi, my name is Casey and I am unhappy. That should go without saying, though. Really, is there any other reason to start a blog? Why am I unhappy you ask? Well, filter the usual reasons through my own presumably unique volatile avoidant temperament and you have your answer. Or perhaps I should elaborate...
I am 29 years old. I have a shitty job. All of the lofty dreams and ambitions that carried me through my unfortunate adolescence have gone unfulfilled. I am a bit lonely. I am probably loved, but not in any way that is relevant to my daily life. Basically, I am on course to die as a crazy cat lady, except that I am not female and I currently own no cats. Oh, and I live in San Francisco, a city where it happens to be easier to change your gender than to find a place that allows pets.
Strangely enough, however, I am generally happy with my life. I worry about big things constantly, but still try to maintain enough perspective to focus on all of the small things. Ultimately, I am finally creating this blog tonight after months of saying that I would because I have once again been disappointed and disillusioned. This is hardly a new occurance, but I feel like I have finally had enough. Maybe it is because I saw John McCain give a speech tonight, but that was only the beginning.
I don't feel like going into specifics just right now- I am not quite yet ready to be so bold- but suffice it to say tonight just served to remind me of how inadequate and alone I am. No, that doesn't sound quite right. It's more like I am a most adequate man at a particularly inadequate time. Yeah, I think that might be it. Timing has never been my forte.
I have learned enough in my lifetime, though, to know that it is never the right time until you make it so, and that brings me to this, my new blog. I have seen disappointment and alienation firsthand, but I also see it in so many other people that I encounter on a daily basis. I am starting to feel that it is an epidemic which threatens to consume our modern connected yet strangely disconnected society. I feel that we live in a society in which communication has never been easier, and yet we have forgotten how to communicate. I think that we have forgotten how to communicate because we don't know how to articulate the thoughts and feelings that dwell within our minds. I believe this to be true, and yet I continue to be one of the worst offenders.
The truth is, I am hopelessly neurotic. I hide my true self from others. I lie compulsively. I shut out people that I care about and force them to work too hard to pierce my defenses, and I watch passively as they finally give up. I am a rock, I am an island, and I sit around wondering why I feel so alone. I am living proof that a rock feels pain, but I alternately wallow in it and anesthisize it.
These are the kinds of issues that I hope to address by having a blog. I hope to address these issues not only for myself, but for anyone else who ultimately feels the same way. I have always wanted nothing more than to make a significant contribution to the world, but right now I feel like I can't offer anything to the world until I do some work on myself. Not that I want this blog to be entirely narcissistic-I ultimately want to address anything that is on my mind-yet I feel that I can't really offer anything to the world unless I learn to share more of myself, and that is my ultimate goal.
Of course, I can't be sure that anyone will actually bother to read any of this, but that's okay. The fact that I tried is what ultimately counts, I think.
Your new friend/old friend/casual acquaintance/anonymous blogger,
Casey
I am 29 years old. I have a shitty job. All of the lofty dreams and ambitions that carried me through my unfortunate adolescence have gone unfulfilled. I am a bit lonely. I am probably loved, but not in any way that is relevant to my daily life. Basically, I am on course to die as a crazy cat lady, except that I am not female and I currently own no cats. Oh, and I live in San Francisco, a city where it happens to be easier to change your gender than to find a place that allows pets.
Strangely enough, however, I am generally happy with my life. I worry about big things constantly, but still try to maintain enough perspective to focus on all of the small things. Ultimately, I am finally creating this blog tonight after months of saying that I would because I have once again been disappointed and disillusioned. This is hardly a new occurance, but I feel like I have finally had enough. Maybe it is because I saw John McCain give a speech tonight, but that was only the beginning.
I don't feel like going into specifics just right now- I am not quite yet ready to be so bold- but suffice it to say tonight just served to remind me of how inadequate and alone I am. No, that doesn't sound quite right. It's more like I am a most adequate man at a particularly inadequate time. Yeah, I think that might be it. Timing has never been my forte.
I have learned enough in my lifetime, though, to know that it is never the right time until you make it so, and that brings me to this, my new blog. I have seen disappointment and alienation firsthand, but I also see it in so many other people that I encounter on a daily basis. I am starting to feel that it is an epidemic which threatens to consume our modern connected yet strangely disconnected society. I feel that we live in a society in which communication has never been easier, and yet we have forgotten how to communicate. I think that we have forgotten how to communicate because we don't know how to articulate the thoughts and feelings that dwell within our minds. I believe this to be true, and yet I continue to be one of the worst offenders.
The truth is, I am hopelessly neurotic. I hide my true self from others. I lie compulsively. I shut out people that I care about and force them to work too hard to pierce my defenses, and I watch passively as they finally give up. I am a rock, I am an island, and I sit around wondering why I feel so alone. I am living proof that a rock feels pain, but I alternately wallow in it and anesthisize it.
These are the kinds of issues that I hope to address by having a blog. I hope to address these issues not only for myself, but for anyone else who ultimately feels the same way. I have always wanted nothing more than to make a significant contribution to the world, but right now I feel like I can't offer anything to the world until I do some work on myself. Not that I want this blog to be entirely narcissistic-I ultimately want to address anything that is on my mind-yet I feel that I can't really offer anything to the world unless I learn to share more of myself, and that is my ultimate goal.
Of course, I can't be sure that anyone will actually bother to read any of this, but that's okay. The fact that I tried is what ultimately counts, I think.
Your new friend/old friend/casual acquaintance/anonymous blogger,
Casey
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